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[personal profile] concretekiss
Across the street they are tearing down a large building. Throughout the day I snuck moments to gaze out the window & watch men smash things with sledge hammers. One would tire & hand the hammer to another who would begin wailing away. I wondered if they were gentle as lambs at home, having shattered windows & kicked in brick walls all day. I wanted to ask if I could help.

There is a divide, in eljay frienddom, between people who are internet friends and people who step out of the former, into your life, and offer you their hand. I play mine close to my chest and don't mention how that matters. - A Wise, Eloquent & Beautiful Woman

Being cantankerous, with heavy soda-shaken heart, refusing to retain a superficial network of replaceables or become one to anyone else, being at times unreasonably scrupulous about things such as dependability & character, having trust issues, preferring quality to quantity, I have very few real life friends, but hoooo are those I have really something. There is this one long lanky girl who I met at age 7 & have heaved through 20 years & this...I wish you could hear the offkey Serenade of Love on my answering machine. Another I'ma call after I'm done with this entry has the most rewarding giggle & sweetpotato pie with praline liqueur in the whipcream. In some of you I see the bff potential, a life-time warranty & wish I could have you shipped out to me. Many of you I've never met, yet, have over the years read the thoughts I cannot manifest anywhere else &, silly I know, it's just now struck me. You people are getting my bottled & sea-strewn messages.

Blues in the park is coming soon. I can't believe I've only just begun to dance publicly two years ago, & am now learning the secret language. I began with my eyes closed & for only a short spurt, never for an entire song, afraid to catch someone pointing at me, belly clutched in laughter. But if by chance you open your eyes to see someone closeby, smiling, nodding along I think it means you don't dance bad.

Also, my paycheck is SO big & sexy. Caring for two little ones alone in the big city with no support I deserve a pat on the butt.

I would like to somehow understand what in Chopin's nocturnes brings me to tears. They are only notes. Maybe it is the way they are spaced, sometimes like lamenting chirps? There HAS to be some sort of scientific explanation.

Date: 2006-05-19 11:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] liquid-siftings.livejournal.com
Chopin is très émouvant, definitely. There is some Schubert that has the same effect on me. Something that unlocks the emotional self and leads it outside the self, vibrant, tender, and joyous.

And congrats with the paychecks. A little security is a lovely thing.

Date: 2006-05-19 11:53 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] flightviolation.livejournal.com
if you can tell me what Schubert songs yr referring to i'd like to search for them.

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