it will be over soon

[concretekiss]

Let me save you some time. We begin
with two incomplete and co-dependant morons, at least one
preferably hiding some socially debilitating yet somehow
charming eccentricity, exhibits signs of mild schizophrenia
obsessive compulsiveness, hides it like a pulsating
baboon heart under his coffee shop apron or is possibly a whore.

Our fools meet through a series of zany incidents to find
they’ve never been truly happy until now, the way you never
knew you needed Cool Ranch Doritos til the day your finger
slipped on 2 at the vending machine, and each accepts
the other’s oddities. Surely we can find something to do
with your dick shaped nose.

Now the dilemma, since good lovin’ should be hard to come by;
One must chance upon the other in the act of what appears
to be treachery; their lizard lipped lover in the embrace of some
stranger, when really it was two secret agents speaking in Morse
Code through an innocent series of nipple pinches and THIS
is what distends into some unbearably gut-busting side-splitting
nun-punching hilarity because it’s gonna take a monumental
act of courage to reconcile.

Here is where you can hardly stand to wait for some bastards
to plow their Jaguars through store fronts
bust up the wedding, sob and grovel into the loud
speakers of your childhood, run naked through airports in nothing
but ranch dressing and hang from helicopters screaming
I love you I love you I’ve always LOVED YOU, and the drivers always
pull over and the crowds always gather cooing like jerks
with nothing better to do because oh my god Barbara it's love

and the speech always flowers like I know I lied and stabbed you
three times in the face but if you can walk away from something so right
I just don’t know what the fuck. And there you have it
cue Mentos cue strewn glass cue sidekick blowing a sheepdog
cue incredulous janitor roll credits You're welcome.

Comments

if it's not love, then it's the BOMB

[theazureman.livejournal.com]

Why is it that the big, heart-melting, emotional payoff in a romcom is NOT the romance, or the developing intimacy, or the dedication, but the BIG HUMILIATING PUBLIC APOLOGY scene? Is the msg here really he can treat me like poo so long as he grovels in front of my friends once in a while?

And as always love your writing it's so clever & unexpected & wryly conceals its emotional wallop & gush gush & aren't you getting a little sick of my fanboy jibber-jabber by now?

Re: if it's not love, then it's the BOMB

[flightviolation.livejournal.com]

sadly, i think the reason is because it's riveting and makes money.

i'm glad you enjoy reading my mess. i must say i enjoy yr gushing. i didn't even know i was doing all that stuff until you told me.